Adventures in Babysitting by the Asian Baby Daddy

This is my FIRST TIME BABYSITTING. Names Changed to Protect the Innocent.

When two of my friends told me they would be having a baby. I was very excited for them. I was also excited that maybe they would let me babysit him. I really wanted to do this because I had never taken care of a baby or child still in diapers and I wanted to learn how to do it and deal with it. I mentioned that I would like to help if they needed me. They took my request into favorable advisement.

Well after their son (Johnny) was born (about 6 months later) one of my friends (Jennifer) called me about babysitting her son. She said that they were attending baptism classes at their nearby church. They had a regular baby sitter but for some reason she couldn’t make it at the last minute. She asked if i could come take care of Johnny while they were in class. It would only be for 30-40 minutes.

When I got over there David feed me some dinner and gave me the basic rundown then Jennifer came downstairs and they both gave me a crash course in diaper changing.
 
Johnny was asleep upstairs, they left and I sat downstairs with the baby monitor and did some work. After about 15-20 minutes he started crying.
 
So I went upstairs and picked him up. I think as soon as he saw that I was not one of them he started crying even more. So I took him downstairs and tried to give him his bottle. He pushed it away then started squirming like crazy and crying more and more. I tried putting him in his play chair. He would play a bit then cry then play. When he would play and was looking away from me he would stop crying. But as soon as he saw me again the crying kicked into full gear. He started screaming pretty much no stop. I talked to him and sang to him then I walked him around the house and all this went on for another 10 – 15 minutes. Then as he started screaming even louder I realized that he seemed more uncomfortable (he had an expression of discomfort on his face) so then I decided it might be diaper time.
 
I smelled him and decided that was part of the problem. I took him back to the floor in their den with the changing mat down, a diaper and some wipes.
 
At this point what I didn’t know (they forgot to tell me until after) was that he had been very constipated for a couple days and so hadn’t gone in a couple days….
 
He was no longer constipated …
 
I took off his diaper and it was absolutely FULL of shit …
 
I have a really strong gag reflex and wasn’t quite prepared for the smell though I figured it would be bad…
 
I started to gag and cough while trying to hold him up and get the diaper away from him. He is strong and was squirming really hard and screaming … Poop was starting to fly off him.
 
I tried to get him up quick enough but I didn’t and so he got shit all over himself and all over the changing mat. I was holding him up trying to keep him off the mat and grab wipes to clean him. I think the box of wipes was new so they were tightly packed. I couldn’t pull them out with one hand, I was struggling. I could only get them out by getting a big wad. This meant I was wiping him not with a single open wipe but a big bunched up group of wipes. This was not very efficient. The wad did not wipe very well.
 
Eventually, I got him cleaned off but I couldn’t put his onesie back on cause it had shit on it. Then he was clean but he was struggling and I couldn’t seem to get the diaper to stay. Eventually I did but then he didn’t have any other clothes on. I took him into the living room because the area around the mat was a bit of a mess with the shitty diaper and thousands of used wipes. …
 
Just as I got to the living room David and Jennifer walked in (he still hadn’t stopped crying though it was better) ..
 
I was EXHAUSTED!!! All I could say was, “Please Help!”
 
I wish that someone had been there with a video tape. I am sure it was really funny.
 
It was a good experience though. and I never got upset or frustrated…. it was crazy and hysterical! Surreal!
 
I told them I would do it again.  

The funny thing also is that after all that Johnny just laughed and smiled at me and with me!

From Baby Mama

We had not been dating that long when this happened, and he told me the story via chat.  I was laughing so hard I was crying.  I also knew that any guy that would laugh about this AND say he would do it again was a keeper!  And a great “Daddy” for a plastic doll I won via social media.